Monthly Baby Photos

Today is Connor's 1st birthday!  Over the course of his life, I have taken thousands of priceless pictures of him.   Perhaps none are more telling and document his life better than the ones I have been taking on the 17th of every month.  It is amazing to see his growth month to month.

Connor was born May 17th, 2012 at Hilton Head Regional Medical Center.  He weighed 8 oz. upon birth but dropped to 6 lbs 8 oz by the time we left.   He made tremendous gurgling sounds all night long. He was a noisy, noisy baby.   

He was so tiny! 

The first month and more he was terribly jaundiced.  His eyes were very yellow for almost 8 weeks. He was scrawny and had little chicken legs. He had wildly spikey hair.  And he never slept longer than 2.5 hours straight.  He was a hungry boy that demanded to be fed round the clock. This seems so long ago.

By his second month, his jaundice cleared and his eyes got whiter.  He perked up, was more alert and started to smile.  He still has this wrye smile - like maybe he's up to no good and knows something that you don't...

By three months he was really quite fun.  Though he wasn't sleeping, he was actively playing with toys, reaching for things and interested in his sister Molly.

And it just kept getting better from there.  His thick black spikey hair became a bit more red, more blonde and he started to sport a Donald Trump hair do.

Full comb over now.   I am not sure why I didn't get it cut.  Seriously, look how long that was. 

By 6-months his hair is really long and we will always look back on pictures now and ask - WHY didn't we get his hair cut?  I guess it was part of his charm.  Here he starts looking like a baby and less like an infant, too. Maybe it's in the double chin and those thighs.  He smiles all the time and I am stopped at the supermarket - "your baby is SO happy."  I know! 

Month 7 is a real transformation - hair cut really helps.  He looks old.   Where has my infant gone? 

From 8-10 months, you can see subtle changes.  There are a few bumps and bruises on his head as he is always getting into something. 

Now that hair is really blonde!

By the time 11 months comes around, I don't even remember to take his monthly picture until the 20th of the month. I instantly feel guilty but have a lot going on with work so I forgive myself.  I take the picture but it's not the best one - he's so busy now, it's hard to get him to sit still.  I am pretty sure it's the lighting here but his hair does look a bit red...

And then there's today.  His birthday. His 12 month shot.  My infant, not an infant anymore, but a baby - a toddler even.  

It's hard to describe how I feel today.  Maybe you know because you have kids and you feel like they've grown up so fast.  It's a mixture of sadness and pride.  Happiness, elation and longing for a different time.   We don't have any plans to have any more children so this is my last baby. The last time I will rock a baby to sleep and hold a small baby that's mine in my arms.  With all the sleep deprivation over the last year, I kept wanting him to sleep through the night.  But the bonding that occurred in those hours in the middle of the night were crucial and have made us stronger.  When he takes his first steps (any day now), or really says his first meaningful words, it's nothing but full steam ahead.  Sometimes I wish I could just press pause.  Today's milestone is a good reminder to slow down and just enjoy every moment you can.